Let's Talk About Sex, Baby
by Rox3l
Summary: AkuRoku. Axel thinks he might like guys. So he proposition Roxas, his gay best friend to have sex. But Roxas' life has been more then difficult when it comes to sex, and it soon all comes crashing down around him. On Hiatus.
1. Let's Talk About Sex, Baby

Rox3l (9/10/2012): Okay, so after trying like hell to get out chapter 5 I decided that I needed to make some changes to this story. This isn't where I meant it to go when I started it, so Roxas' past needed to change a bit. Not a whole lot, just enough for me to care about this again.

~O~

"You want me to do what?" I yell, my mouth hanging open in utter shock and disbelief.

There is no way he just said _that_ to me, Roxas Strife.

"I want you to have sex with me," he repeats.

_He _being my quite possibly temporarily insane best friend, Axel Dafoe. You know, like the actor, but with no relation. In almost 19 years of being best friends I think this has to be the most disturbing thing he has ever said to me. And Axel is the king of telling me disturbing shit. Like this time he got really drunk and slept with one of his mother's friends. I'm talking about one of those women that have been alone for so long that they are just creepy, and start collecting cats. I had the unpleasant experience of being trapped in a car with him on an hour and a half long car ride while he recalled to me all the nasty details. I had almost been ready to take the chance of jumping out the window in the middle of the highway. Or the time he called me to come over and help him because he had gotten his dick stuck in his backyard fence (for the love of God, don't ask) and couldn't get it out.

That was an afternoon well spent.

Not.

But this...

"Why?" I hear myself ask before I even realize that I care.

Axel rolls his shoulders in a shrug and tilts his head to the side, looking off over my left shoulder. He only does that when he's not sure of how a conversation is going to go. 19 years and I know all of his tells.

"I dunno," he said quietly. "I'm thinking that I might like guys. So I want to see what the sex is like and you're the only gay guy that I know that I would trust to ask."

"So…You're telling me you want to fuck me, your best friend, to see if you might like guys?"

"When you put it that way it sounds stupid," he mutters to the floor.

"Of course it sounds stupid," I hiss. "How else is that supposed to sound?"

"Okay. I get it," he snaps irritably. "It's a stupid and moronic thing to ask. Will you do it?"

I sigh and close my eyes, sex with Axel, my best and closest friend. It's not like I haven't thought about it before, because I have, frequently to be honest. Axel is hot as hell and I would be lying if I said I didn't wonder what he's like in bed. I mean, I've heard him brag and tell stories about the girls he has been with, but that is just talk. Still…there is a very good chance that having sex would change our relationship. I have made the mistake of having sex with a friend before, it made things awkward to the point where we both agreed that it would be better for both of us if we were not friends anymore.

It would kill a part of me to lose Axel.

Sex…with Axel.

What if he likes it?

What if he finds himself a boyfriend? I mean, I'm just his friend. It's not like he is going to want to date me if we do this, right?

It would kill a different part of me to see him with another guy...

Opening my eyes I look at Axel. He's just standing there, an anxious look on his face. Was it really worth risking our many years of friendship for one night with him? Sadly, I already know my answer to that. It was. It would be worth every second. I just couldn't pass this up.

"Okay."

"Seriously?" Axel blurts out. "You'll let me?"

"Yeah, but I have a few rules."

Axel's face goes curious, "Really? Like what?"

"I only go bareback for guys that can prove they are clean."

He blinks for a second, probably at my bluntness and I feel myself start to blush. "I…uh…I didn't mean to say it like that…"

He smirks at me, "Well, you know I am. You know every girl that I have ever slept with and you were with me when I picked up my last STD screening."

I nod, "Where do you want to do it? I don't have sex in public places."

Axel grins, a white flash against that olive skin. "Where is the fun in that?" he teases. Then his face goes serious. "We can do it at my place. My parents are going to be gone this weekend."

I nod again, "Okay. That works. I don't have work Saturday night so I will come over around nine-ish. Oh, and make sure you take a shower before I get there."

He stands up, "Alright. Seriously, thanks Roxas."

"Don't thank me just yet," I murmur. "I'll see you Saturday."

"Yeah, see you." he says awkwardly and after a moment, leaves.

I wait until I hear the slam of the front door before I throw myself back onto my bed, staring numbly up at the ceiling. What the hell did I just agree to? Rolling over I glance at my iHome, it glows 7:32 PM. I groan and bury my head in my pillow, guilty chewing at my stomach. I wonder what he would say if I called him and told him I changed my mind? Pulling my phone from my pocket I flip it to the little keyboard and go to Axel's number. My finger hovers over the Send button for half a minute before I drop my head back onto the pillow. I can't call him. If I hear his voice again I'll forget why this is a bad idea. So I push the little button to send him a text.

**Um...so I dont think this is a good idea...**

I slide the little screen back over the keyboard and set it on the quilt next to my head. He's driving right now, I probably won't get a response for at least ten minutes. This is why I jump like eight fucking feet in the air when my ringtone goes off, signaling a new message, shaking my head I pick the phone back up and my stomach twists as I open Axel's reply.

**What? Why not?**

I bite at my lip trying to think about what the hell I could possibly say to him.

**We've been friends forever. Dont you feel weird about the thought of havin sex with me?**

I barely place the phone back down for a few seconds before I get another message. I forget sometimes how fast of a texter Axel is. He must have stopped somewhere, there's no way he could reply that fast while driving. Then again, it's Axel and I wouldn't put it past him to have mastered something that dangerous., and stupid.

**Of course its weird. but roxas, I cant trust anyone else with this.**

Oh that's great, make me feel guilty about wanting to saying no. Axel you're an ass. . .

**I thought you said im the only gay guy you know? **I type furiously, tossing the cell aside to release some of the anger I have about being made to feel bad that this could destroy us as friends, among other things.

**You are. And if I didnt trust you so much to ask you for this, I would have just found a prostitute or somethin.**

I sigh and feel my resolve crumble. My phone lights up and rings again so I read the second message that he sent.

**Dont worry so much rox. Everything will be fine. I'll see you sat night.**

With nothing else to say I drop the phone to the floor and close my eyes.

Sleep.

I just want to sleep right now.

~O~

So as it were the next day and a half went pretty good, if I do say so myself. My cousin Sora came home from college for the week and came over Friday for a visit. We dicked around the whole afternoon on Halo and C.o.D until I had to go to work at five. Even there, the wonderful world of Dunkin' Donuts wasn't nearly as bad as it usually is. We didn't get one rude customer all night. That in itself was a wonderful and welcome change. We even got out on time, another welcomed change. Saturday, I slept 'till noon, which in its own right is nothing short of Jesus walking on water. It's not something I get to do very often with family screaming all through the house at all hours of the day and fuckin' night.

Not to mention Ventus; my early rising, soccer playing, identical twin's room is right next door. The sheer fact that I even got to sleep past 8AM was a miracle. I spent the entire day lounging in my room writing, listening to my iPod way too loud. Now here we are at quarter past eight Saturday night and I decide it is time to get ready to go to Axel's for this possible disaster. Getting up from my bean bag chair I toss my spiral bound notebook onto my bed, grab a towel from the hall closet and head into the bathroom. Turning on the water I adjust the temp, before disrobing and stepping into the spray.

I enjoy the feel of the water on my skin for a moment before I begin the laborious task of making sure all unwanted body hair is gone. I shave my legs, armpits, backside, everything except for my light happy trail. After that I wash my hair, shampoo and conditioner. Before scrubbing down with a scrubby and shutting the water off. Wrapping the towel around my waist I step back out into the hall and return to my domain. Now it is time to decide what I want to wear. It's not that I am planning to be in my clothes for that long, but you also don't want to wear old underwear if someone is going to be seeing you in them.

So, I pick out my silver silk boxers, black jeans, and my white and black UFC shirt. I look in my full length mirror to do my hair before taking in my appearance one last time before I leave the room. Grabbing my keys, a few condoms and a small thing of lube before stepping once again out into the hall, I am met with Ventus kicking his soccer ball against the wall between his room and the bathroom.

"Hey. Where are you going?"

"Axel's."

He stares at me seriously, "you're wearing your date clothes, why?"

I glance down at the carpet debating how much, if anything, I should tell him. Looking back up I bite my lip, "Axel asked me to have sex with him."

I can see him start, and then his face crumbles, "Oh, Roxas. You are going to get your heart broken."

"I can't not do it," I mumble defensively. "Besides, I'll be fine."

He places his hand on my shoulder, not saying anything and nods. Without another word I all but bolt down the stairs, shove my way out the side door and jump into my car. Axel is stand in the driveway as I pull up, the light from the headlights catching in those startling green eyes.

"Yo," he says softly leaning on the driver's side door. "I was starting to think you weren't going to come."

"I said nine-ish. It's only quarter past," I chide as I shut the car off and climb out.

"Right," Axel says sheepishly turning and walking back toward the front door.

Silently I follow, having no idea of what to say to him as we go into the foyer and up the staircase. Axel remains silent as he pushes the door to his bedroom open, walks in, and stops in the middle of the room. I go in after him closing said door and leaning against it as if it is my lifeline. My heart is beating a million times too fast.

"Now what?" I whisper my voice breathy.

"I'm not sure," Axel replies, shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

He is never nervous, and it's just then that I realize that it is going to have to be me that gets things going. Taking a breath and summoning all the courage I have I push off the door and move closer to him. He watches me with wide eyes as I reach down and take a hold of the hem of my shirt and pull it up over my head, dropping it to the floor. I then kick off my shoes, moving my hands to the button of my jeans. I hear Axel make a small noise as I push the button open as I move through the room.

He is breathing so heavily that I can see the rise and fall of his chest through his shirt. Those intense eyes never leave me as I slide back onto his bed, laying against his pillow and slipping my hands down to my jeans, pulling them down my hips and kicking them away. I lay there and watch as Axel mimics me and pulls his own shirt up over his head, then slips the black basketball shorts he's wearing off. He stands there in his emerald green boxers for only a moment before he's moving across the room and climbing on top of me.

I reach up to him and run my fingers through those long red strands before taking a hold of the back of his head and bringing his face down for a kiss. He meets my lips almost hungrily, dropping his body flush against mine. I let out a small moan at the feeling of him pinning me to the bed. Axel tilts his head to the side and slips his tongue into my mouth. I wrap my legs around his waist and push up against him, moving my own tongue against his. He growls and thrusts against me so that I can feel his dick starting to get hard.

Pushing my own growing hardness against his I tug on his hair, moving my mouth down to his neck and begin to suck on the skin there. He moans, tilting his head back so I can get at more of his neck, leaving two or three dark red marks. I then give his shoulder a small shove, trying to tell him without words to switch positions with me. He lets me up and takes my place against the pillow, his erection straining in his boxers. I go back to kissing his neck, and then start to make my way along his collarbone, kissing at his shoulder, then down his chest until I get to the soft, soft skin of his nipple.

I run the tip of my tongue over it and Axel takes in a sharp breath. I do it again and he makes this little 'ah' that goes straight to my cock. I latch onto his nipple with my mouth and begin to suck. Axel throws his head back and lets out a loud moan. I swear to God, it has to be the hottest thing I have ever heard in my entire life. I take his other nipple between my thumb and forefinger and roll it around, feeling it harden. I swap sides and do it all over again, listening to Axel make these pleading moans.

After another minute or two I continue down the center of his sternum, over his taunt belly following his happy trail like a path leading me to the treasure. Which, I guess it kind of is. By the time I come to rest in between his spread legs Axel's moans have turned into whimpers. Hot little 'for the love of God, fuck me' whimpers. I lean over and nudge his trapped length with my nose, breathing in his scent. He pushes his hips up and I open my mouth against the cloth, feeling the rigidity of the flesh beneath. I mouth over him a few times until he's panting and looking down at me with wild eyes.

"Please!" he gasps, throwing his head back and forth against the pillow.

I smile and sit back again, taking a hold of the elastic waistband of his boxers and sliding them down his long legs. He lays there, completely naked and looks like the embodiment of sin. His hair is slightly messed, his chest rising and falling with each excited breath. Erection jumping against his lower stomach, the head resting in his belly button, I don't remember Axel being this big. Then again, I have never seen him full aroused. Sure, I've seen him with morning wood a few years ago, but that was nothing compared to the hard-on he's sporting at the moment.

I take him in my hand and give him a few strokes, watching his eyes slip closed. When I'm sure he distracted I lean down and give the head of his penis a firm lick. His whole body jerks and his eyes fly open to watch as I take him into my mouth.

"F-fuck," I hear him groan as I use my tongue to get the shaft wet so it will slide easier.

I close my eyes as I work my mouth over him, enjoying the feeling of Axel in my mouth. I can't count the number of fantasies that I have had about this. Bobbing my head I start to suck on the flesh, swirling my tongue around the head when I pull up and letting him touch my throat when I go down. Axel isn't even trying to be quite, he's moaning and swearing and loving every second of this, which makes me feel proud that I'm causing him to react with such abandon. Pulling him from my mouth I kiss along the underside of the shaft until I get to his balls.

"Roxas, wha. . .?"

I don't answer him, I just lick. He takes in a breath as start to play with his sac. It takes him a moment but he moans and the tension goes out of him as I mouth and kiss and lick him there. After he starts getting really into it, I move on, pushing his legs up so that he is exposed. I hear his make a sound of protest, obviously he's no used to this. I feel him tense, ready to kick away so I take his cock in my hand and give the softening flesh a few strokes. It re-hardens and Axel relaxes.

I lay on my stomach, still working my hand over him and push my face in between his cheeks. He makes a startled yip when I press my tongue to his hole. I work his erection more as I lick him trying to mix the sensations. It seems to take him longer to get used to this but after a while the tension in him starts to go and he moves against me a bit. When he gets to this point I pull away and sit up, hand still on his erection but not moving. Axel is looking at me like he's not sure of what he wants, or what to think.

"So," I say quietly. "Did you like all that?"

He licks his lips, "I liked you playin' with my balls. Never had anyone do that before."

"What about the other thing?"

Axel's eyes shift off to the side for a moment, "It was okay."

"Just okay?" I prompt.

"Yeah...I think I only really liked it when you were jacking me off. Are there guys that get off on that?"

I blush and bite my lip, "I can."

"Really?" I see Axel move out of the corner of my eye and his cock slips from my hand as he sits up. "Can I ...can I do that to you?"

Swallowing hard I nod and lay back down, pulling my legs against my chest. Axel stares at me for a second before he gets down and brings his face to the most intimate parts of me. I can feel his breath there and I worry that he won't want to do it. Then I feel his tongue run over my hole. I gasp without meaning to and blush. I feel him grin and he does it again, harder this time. I moan. It seems that my reactions give him fuel to keep going because the more I moan the harder he licks me until I feel his tongue slip into me. I scream his name. Axel then begins to fuck me with his tongue, quick little jabs over and over until I'm panting and screaming and I can feel my orgasm building and if things don't slow down this is going to be it.

"A-Axel. Wait, I'm gonna come if you don't stop."

He pulls back and looks down at me. That look, totally feral, tells me everything. He was enjoying this, he was enjoying this immensely. I roll off the bed and go to my pants, pulling out the lube, but leaving the condoms. If this is the one and only time I get to have sex with Axel, I want to be able to feel all of him. I lay back down on the bed and hand him the lube. He opens it without a word and squirts a bit on himself. He then rubs it over the skin, using the extra on his fingers to rub over my hole.

I think curiosity gets the better of him because without saying anything he presses his finger into me. I gasp as it slides all the way into me. The look on Axel's face is priceless, I don't think he was expecting it to be that easy.

I smile sheepishly up at him, "I'm not a virgin."

"I can see that," he whispers as he moves his finger in and out making me moan.

I don't think I can take anymore foreplay and I guess neither can Axel, because he pulls his finger out and presses himself against my opening.

"Go slow. You'll hurt me if you go too fast."

Axel nods and presses a little then backs off, repeating until finally my body opens to him and the head slips inside. Axel swears, going ridged as his cock starts to slide in. I take hold of my own penis and start to stroke it. In this position the only way I find anal pleasurable is if I mix it with touching myself. Axel takes a breath and rears above me, locking the bends in his elbows behind my knees and starts to fuck me. And I mean fuck me. Hard, fast thrusts that have me crying out and right on the edge of orgasm from the get go.

He's pounding into me, face slack with pleasure and abandon. I can tell by the way his hips move that he's close. He knew he wasn't going to last long, so he decided to make it intense. He pushes forward placing his hands on the bed, bending me in half and thrusting, moaning.

"I'm close," I choke out.

"Me too," Axel grunts.

His pace falters and I can feel him start to spasm, and just the feeling of Axel coming inside of me is enough to finish me. The orgasm hits me like a ton of bricks and I'm arching and screaming, fluid splattering against my chest and face. After another few intense moments Axel all but collapses back and pulls his softening penis out of me and falls over.

"_Wow_," he pants.

I lay there, not moving, not saying anything, my own come cooling on my skin. _Wow_ was right.

~O~


	2. I Get Off

So, let me take a moment and explain a bit about my personal life. I came out to my parents when I was fourteen, that summer I started dating my first boyfriend. He was older, a senior in high school. We dated for nine months. The relationship went okay. We got along good, but there really wasn't any sexual attraction between us and we parted ways. About a month later I met Axel's friend Demyx. He was really cool, we had a ton in common and it was through him that I met the guy that took my virginity. Now, I would like to tell you that I dated the guy, that it was serious, and that I thought it through the first time I decided to have sex. But I can't. The honest truth is that I met Demyx's friend Yuki at a concert and my first time having sex was in the backseat of his car in the parking lot after the show was over.

Not really the romantic endeavor that I had planned it to be, but it wasn't horrible. He was a nice guy and patient with me. As far as first times go I'm sure there have been worse. Now, after that first time I got into a very serious and hot an' heavy relationship with my cousin Sora's bff. We dated for almost two years, I was head over heels for him but we had a pretty bad falling out when I found out that he was in love with Sora and was using me as some sort of replacement because Sora wasn't ready to come out to his family, or commit to a man. It was fucking bullshit. I was really messed up after that and I got more involved with some of Demyx's more 'sketchy' friends. Started meeting friends of a friend, and ended up in a really bad place.

At one point I started having sex with anyone and I mean anyone. Anyone that would have me. People I knew. People I didn't. Just anyone. I stopped talking to my family; I had a falling out with Axel and would go off for days to find men to have sex with. My schooling suffered. I know Axel was really worried about me at that time. He had heard the stories from his friends that I was having sex with a lot strange men. He tried to help me, but after the mind games that Riku had put me through I wasn't in the head space to be able to ask for any sort of help. It took me about a year to figure out that I didn't need all these men or the sex that it wasn't helping me get over Riku and it defiantly wasn't healthy for me.

I started seeing a therapist. She really helped me figure out what I wanted out of my life and that everything I had done didn't necessarily define me. That if I was going to change, I was going to have to want it and work hard for it. And I did. Six months of therapy and I wasn't sneaking off to meet strange men in allies, or shady motels. This is where one of my rules for having sex with a new partner came from. I did too much when I didn't respect myself, so if I am going to be better, I can't go back to things that I used to do back then. It's been three years since then, and I haven't dated anyone, haven't had sex with strangers.

But here I sit, on the edge of my best friend's bed not knowing what to say to him after we just had the most mind blowing sex I have ever had. He's laying against his head board staring off into space, a thoughtful expression on his face. I need to go get cleaned up, but I don't know if I want to move. I feel numb inside, like I just broke a part of myself that I will never be able to fix. I don't like this feeling, but I decide that I have to get up and go to the bathroom and clean myself up. It's not a matter of wanting to, as _having_ too. Sex isn't like in the movies, where they do it and just cuddle afterwards. What goes in must eventually come back out. So I get up and take a few steps to the door.

"I'm gonna go get cleaned up."

Axel looks at me as if it is the first time he is seeing me, "Oh yeah. That's probably a good idea."

He gets up and follows me into the bathroom. We wash up with no further words to each other. This is painfully awkward, I can't stand it. I _knew _this was a bad idea. Sex always changes things, and there's no way in hell that it wasn't going to fuck things up between best friends. I mean, I have always had a sort of crush on Axel but I valued his friendship way more then I want to pursue him as a boyfriend. Yeah, I fantasized about sex with him but again, he was more important to me then just that. And now I go and do the most retarded thing I have ever done in my whole life.

Axel turns the sink off and looks at me. I look back at him and my heat is suddenly in my throat. I know the next words out of his mouth are going to hurt.

"That was different then that I was expecting."

My heart squeezes painfully, what does that mean? A million things fly through my mind but I can't form any of them into words.

"Oh?"

Axel nods, "Like, I've had sex with tons of girls. But that was nothing like any of it."

"So does that mean you liked it?"

He looks at me like I have suddenly grown another head and it started singing opera. "Dude, seriously? Did you not notice that I didn't even last like five minutes? I'm totally better than that, and you made me bust my load like it was my first time."

I blush, a small amount of pride welling in my chest. But it wilts at my next thought; He liked it..

"Does that mean you're gonna find yourself a boyfriend?"

He looks thoughtful for a minute, "Yeah I guess. I mean, maybe."

My heart does this painful flop and I feel tears stinging at the back of my eyes. I knew it. I fucking _knew_ it. All the women that Axel has been with never bothered me, because they were just women. But now that we have had sex, I can't stand the thought of him being with another man. I mean, I've never let myself think what it would be like to have Axel as a boyfriend, but that doesn't mean hearing him admit that he would like to find one doesn't hurt.

"Or I could keep fucking you."

I stare at him. I honestly don't know what to say to that. My mind does just not comprehend what he just said to me. I'm starting to sense a theme here.

"What?" I gape.

"We're best friends. And I don't know about you, but we just had some of the best sex that I have ever had. And I would like to do it again. So I was kind of thinking, if you wanted we could be friends with benefits?"

I take a deep breath, mulling what he just said around. I've spent the last almost 4 years trying to build myself up to someone that wasn't using sex, and here Axel was offering me my old self back on a silver platter. I never actually talked with Axel about what happened back then, didn't talk about my therapy, or anything about that year of my life. I know he heard the stories, but he doesn't know what I had to claw myself out of, or else he wouldn't be offering this to me. It's partly my fault for never telling him, but that's not the part of my brain that I'm using right now. Right now, I would like nothing more than to climb back into Axel's bed and do everything all over again. All night. So against everything instinct that I have to say no, I agree. After all, I have already risked our friendship, why not my well being as well?

Axel smiles that brilliant smile at me and comes over to me, taking me in his arms and kissing me. I moan into the kiss and let him pick me up and set me on the edge of the counter. I wrap my legs around his waist and feel that he is already getting excited. I smile and take his length into my hand, stroking it. He arches into me, his breath coming just that little bit faster. He then looks down at me with feral eyes and attacks my neck, leaving bruises to match the ones I had left on his skin earlier. He kisses his way down my body, before dropping to his knees which brings him eye level with my now erect penis. He stares at it for a moment, as if wondering if he can do this. I run my fingers threw his hair and he looks up at me.

"You don't have to do it. You've done a lot tonight. I didn't even do everything my first night with a guy. You can take it easy. Do this another time."

He says nothing and looks back down at my erection. After a moment he takes it in his hand and give it a few light strokes. I let my head fall back and enjoy the sensations. I hear him take a breath and open my eyes just in time to see him take the head in his mouth. My body jolts with the pleasure. It's been a long, long time since I've had a blowjob and I realize just how much I like them. Axel takes a little more into his mouth before he starts to suck and bob his head. I can't help but moan and let my fingers get tangled in his hair.

"Axel, fuck. . ." I whisper as he gains more confidence and tries to edge my erection into his throat. I can feel him smirk and he moans a bit, sending the vibrations threw my cock and my back arches.

I've never felt something so amazing before. I can hardly believe that this was the first time that he had ever given a blowjob. Panting, my legs twitch, I can feel the orgasm building in my belly and hot damn I have never been so close so fast before. I can hear someone whispering "please please please" and realize that it is me. My fingers tighten in Axel's hair and he must have realized I was about to come from the tremors in my erection because he pulls up, gets to his feet and is pushing at my opening. I adjust myself on the counted and lay back, my head and shoulders resting on the mirror.

Axel slips inside easily, sliding all the way in and feels just delicious inside me. He's slower now, taking his time, working me back to the edge of orgasm and just holding me there for what feels like eternity. I writhe and moan under him, and he just keeps thrusting slow, deliberate. I can tell hoe much the effort he is using to keep himself slow by the shaking of his shoulders, the tension in his stomach. I don't know how long it went on, but I was beyond thought at this point. I was screaming, begging, crying with each thrust for him to finish me, to make me come.

But he won't. He just keeps up his pace until I don't even know what is going on anymore, I don't know which way was up or down, I just know those fierce green eyes are watching me and I need, _need _to come. I can hear myself panting and whimpering, throat sore from screaming at him, from screaming for him.

"Axel, please. I can't take anymore. Please!" I whisper painfully.

That's it, he finally let's go and was thrusting hard and fast. Slamming into me, over and over making me scream even more all over again. I can't help it, my throat hurts so much but I can't stay quiet. At the apex of one thrust Axel twists his hips slightly, hits my prostate and I'm coming. Finally. The pleasure was over whelming, white flashing behind my eyes and I was carving all that pleasure with nails into Axel's back. I hear him cry out and knew he was coming too. Buried so deep inside me.

He catches himself over me on the counter top panting harshly. I can't move. Like, even if I wanted to, I can't. My body is numb from the waist down. Axel moves my legs and slips out from between them, collapsing on the floor his back against the cabinets under the sink. After a few minutes I sit up, my rear gives a dull ache and I know that I am going to be sore for a few days. I hop down off the counter, wobble a little bit and sit down beside Axel. He yawns and throws his arm over my shoulders.

"Wanna take a quick shower and go watch a movie?"

I nod and he helps me up, then pulls me into the tub turning on the water. We wash silently, until Axel makes this little hiss and turns around, showing me the deep gashes that I had left in his back.

"I'm sorry," I whisper hoarsely.

He turns back around and grins at me, "Don't worry about it."

We start talking after that, all the tension suddenly is gone and we are back to being friends. We chat about sex mostly, things we like, and things we don't. I'm surprised that Axel has really enjoyed what we have done tonight, and pleasantly surprised. Since I guess, we are going to be doing more of it.

After the shower we get dressed again and go down stairs to the living room to pick a movie. While I am looking though Axel's movie collection he's in the kitchen making popcorn and getting soda. I finally settle on the movie Splice. I remember that I had wanted to see it when it was in theaters and never got to. So I pop it into the PS3. Axel's family is kind of rich, so they have this killer high def TV and surround sound. It's fucking awesome and it is never a bore to watch movies at Axel's. He comes back into the room with a huge bowl of popcorn and a six pack of cola. I grab a can and plop onto the couch as he asks what we are watching.

"Splice," I reply as I hit play.

I hear Axel chuckle and mutter that he really digs this movie. We get about three quarters of the way into the movie, to the part when the guy fucks the creature-thingy when Axel turns to me and says, "Is it totally wrong that that's turning me on?"

I turn to him sharply and hit him in the side of the head with a pillow. "Dude, that's sick!"

I laugh as he lunges at me and presses his crotch into my hip. I let myself fall back against the cushions and stare up at him. I never knew Axel had this kind of stamina, I'm not sure if I can keep up with him. I shake my head and try to push him off.

"I'm tired. I don't think I can go another round."

He leans down and presses his lips to my ear, making my shiver. "Then suck me off," he whispers.

Heat pools under my skin and I'm sliding down onto the floor before I know it. Axel already has his pants open and his erection is standing at attention. I grip the base with my left and hand and take half the length into my mouth. Axel hissed and widens his legs as far as his pants will allow him. I work over him with my lips and tongue, at one point a little bit of teeth, which excites him even more. I never pegged Axel to be a bit on the masochist side of this, but he seems to respond positively to a little pain. I shove his cock down my throat, relaxing my muscle and feeling my body struggling to remain calm and not choke on something so large. I pull up coughing a bit, his erection slick with saliva. I go back down on it, again fighting with my body to take it all.

Axel thrusts up a bit which breaks my concentration and causes me to come off him coughing and panting. He apologies and I continue to work him until I feel him getting close, so I deep throat him one last time and erupts. I don't have to worry about swallowing, since the head of him is already down my throat. When I feel him relax I let his penis slide from between my lips and wipe my mouth with the back of my hand. He looks down at me and gives me that smile that I can't say no to as he fixes his pants.

"If you keep sucking cock so good I'm gonna have to lock you in my closet and never let you leave my room," he jokes.

I give him a smile and climb back into the couch. There's no tension this time, we just sit there watching the end of the movie like the best of friends we are and not like I just had his dick down my throat.

~O~


	3. The Bad Touch

I lie on my side and stare at the red glowing digital numbers telling me that it's just after two in the morning. Axel is comforting presences pressing against my back, his warm body making me want to snuggle up with him and fall asleep, but I don't. I can't sleep. The memory of everything that happened this night keeps playing like a movie every time I close my eyes. Axel's hands on my body, the heat of his mouth as it wrapped itself around my cock, the way he felt as he slid himself into me. I shiver. Sex with Axel has been more mind blowing then I could have ever dreamed, and his stamina and willingness to experiment are beyond belief. I'm faithfully sure that he's been thinking on this a lot longer then he's been letting on.

I close my eyes, the memory of Axel's hot tongue on my hole makes my lower body tingle and a long shudder works its way down my spine. Axel rolls over onto his side and throws his arm over me and pulls me against his bare chest. He's nude and his semi hardness presses against my buttocks.

I chuckle lightly as he humps against me, "And what have you been dreaming about?"

I can feel him smile against the back of my head, "Those cocksucker lips of yours. Maybe we should put them to good use." He presses a little more firmly against my ass and I can feel him swell even more.

Biting my lip I scoot away and roll to face him, he looks at me curiously, "We need to talk about something."

Seeing that I am serious makes the laughter fade from his eyes and he leans up on his elbow, "Did I do something wrong?"

I shake my head and wave him off with my hand, "No. It's not like that."

He visibly relaxes, "Okay. What's up?"

I curl my legs under me and sit up, Axel's eyes following, "You remember back a few years ago when you heard all that really bad stuff about me so you tried to confront me about it and we didn't talk for like, a year?"

"Yeah," Axel says slowly sitting up to face me. "I was really worried about you back then, Rox."

"I know you were," I whisper looking off to the side for a moment before continuing. "I was pretty messed up by the time you tried to get involved. I think by then I had hit over 50 lovers."

Axel stares at me as if waiting for the joke. When I stay silent his brow furrows, "You serious?"

I nod, "You remember Riku?"

He nods his head, his red hair falling over his shoulder.

"I just couldn't handle that he had only cared about Sora. That all I got out of him was sex, when I was seriously in love with him. It tore me apart, and I started to believe that maybe all I was good for was sex. If Riku hadn't loved me it was because I was only good enough to fuck."

Axel's eyes fill with pain and his hand comes up to squeeze my knee but he doesn't say anything.

"I started to spiral about a month after the break up. I started having sex with a lot of people. I was convinced that if they liked me enough to want to have sex with me, then they must have cared about me. I know you've heard the stories."

Axel's head bobs slightly, "People were saying really terrible things, Rox. And I didn't know what to think or do. You didn't want anything to do with me; I couldn't help you, and was hearing such awful things."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you away like I did. I just wasn't ready to be helped. I had to hit rock bottom first, and I did. I woke up this one night in bed with four other men, men I didn't even know or could remember. Their come was dried on my skin, and that was when I realized that I couldn't keep doing this. That I was going to catch something or maybe even end up dead.

"I was scared. I went home and woke up my mother, I was in tears and told her what I had been doing, and that I needed help. The next day she took me to the doctor and I got an STD screening. I found out I had gonorrhea. My mother broke down as the doctor told us about it and gave me a prescription to treat it. After that she scheduled me an appointment with a therapist. I started going to therapy 3 times a week. She really helped me understand that I was better than just a hole to be fucked. She encouraged me to reconnect with my family, and to start talking to you again. So, I did. I got better and now here I am."

Axel sits there for a long time, just staring at me, his mind obviously trying to work out everything that I had just told him. "Jesus," he whispers after five minutes.

"I'm not proud of what I've done in the past. But I am proud that I was able to overcome it."

Axel gives me just the barest of smiles, "I'm glad you did. I'm glad to have my best friend back." He's silent for another moment. "So, this whole 'friends with benefits' thing is probably not a good idea, huh?"

"That's the thing. I'm not sure. I mean, you aren't just some random guy that I picked up off the street. You're my best friend."

He's looking at me as if he's unsure of himself, so I lean forward and plant a peck on his lips. "Seriously, I'll be fine."

He gives me one of those gorgeous smiles (still a little uncertain around the edges) and pulls me against his body, his lips capturing mine hungrily. I moan and place my hands on his shoulders to steady myself as I crawl onto his lap. His hands fall to my bare hips and I can feel him starting to re-thicken against my ass. I chuckle at him playfully and rub back against him. He arches his hips, sliding that hot flesh again my perineum. I moan. God, no man has ever turned me on as much as Axel can. His fingers come around to pry my cheeks open, sliding deeper to press teasingly against my opening. I gasp and wiggle for him, wanting to feel him press those long thin fingers into me. He makes this masculine chuckle and it makes my heart flutter seconds before his index finger dips into me. I arch and sink down on the digit, trying to push it deeper. Axel gives and answering moan and thrusts his finger a couple times making my breath hitch.

"It is okay if we...?" He asks with his penis already _so_ ready to be shoved inside of me.

I nodded wildly, our previous conversation is lost to the wonderfully sensation that is being with Axel. In that moment I forget everything but him. The way he dips us forward trapping be beneath him, the way I open my legs for him, and he presses the hot throbbing tip of his cock against my so willing hole. He thrusts then, half of his member penetrating me and I cry out for him. He tosses his head back, his hair cascading down his back and with a shove of his hips, is now all the way inside me. I whimper as he settles over me, his hands pressing into the mattress on either side of my head, using it for leverage as he begins a torturous rhythm. A slow pull out then a quick snap of his hips back in. I move against him trying to meet his thrusts, grinding against him when he pushes himself in.

I lose track of time, thought, everything that isn't Axel. Axel around me, against me, _inside_ me. I gasp, my nails digging into his shoulders, desperate for something to cling to as he picks up the pace slightly, his balls slapping against my rear with the force of his thrusts. I hear him grunt as he rears up and takes hold of one of my legs, pulling it to his chest and holding on as he continues to move himself in me. I take hold of handfuls of the bed sheets and bite my lip, trying not to scream. _I want to...I want to...oh God!_

I throw my head back and before I even know what is happening I feel orgasm hit me. All my muscles tense and I feel hot fluid spurting onto my stomach. I cry out as Axel shoves his cock in as deep as he can go and stills. I feel the hot pulsing of him coming inside me. I shiver, my body jerking as he pulls himself out of me and falls off to the side. I lay there and spasm, moaning as the aftershock comes in wave after wave making my body dance. Axel is grinning at me as I writhe on his bed.

"No more!" I gasp. "Oh God, no more. Please."

I can hear Axel chuckle beside me and I feel him press a kiss to my shoulder. The action makes me pause thinking back to the past several hours. He was being quite affectionate for someone who was just interested in the sex. Then again, we were best friends and I had just told him something that had been a very dark time in my life. So I was probably just reading too much into it. Yeah...that's what I told myself anyway.

~O~

Groaning as the sun streaming through the window drags me from sleep, I throw my arm over my eyes. I fucking _hate_ mornings. I lay there for another few minutes before I resign that I am not going to be able to fall back asleep and move my arm. I don't move or try and sit up. Experience had taught me that you had to assess your body and situation before you try and move after a lot of sex and a night's sleep. I lay there and I don't feel too bad. My thighs are sore as fuck, as is my ass. I sit up slowly, feeling just the slightest ache in my hole. I know I am going to have to go home and put some ointment on it to help the abused skin heal. Other than that and the terrible throbbing in my thighs, I'm feeling pretty good. Sighing I stretch my arms over my head and turn to look at Axel. He's asleep on his stomach, hair tousled with sleep and the sheets barely hanging onto the curve of his ass. The gashes that I had left in his skin last night are dark red and there is no mistaking that they are nail marks. It's actually pretty sexy and I can't help the devilish thought as it enters my mind.

Slipping out of bed I pad on silent feet to where my clothes are strewn along the floor and pick up my pants, digging into the pocket for my cell. Grasping it I flip it open and press the little button on the side and wait for the camera to load. When it does I walk back to the side of the bed and aim the phone at Axel. It quacks (yes I have it set to quack) signaling that I had taken the picture and I grin down at the image, wondering if I should send it to anyone. But the thought of someone else seeing Axel half naked, obviously having just had sex with someone, makes my smile fade. A stab of jealously and anger courses through me. I turn away from Axel and plod back to my clothes, yanking them on with jerky movements. I'm so stupid. So fucking stupid. _So fucking stupid_!

I love Axel.

I love him and stupidly thought in the back of my mind that maybe this would change the dynamic between us. Hell, I even worried about the fact that it might. But it wasn't until this moment that I realize I had been hoping that things _would_ change. That he actually might care about me, and not just about the sex. Not just as friends.

Pulling my keys from my pants I trod down the stairs and out the front door without so much as a glance back. There is a terrible ache in my chest and I want to hit something. I am so God damned_ pissed _at myself. I knew. Fucking _knew_ this was a bad idea. But no, once again my dick won out over my brain and I was again totally fucked. Sex with Axel was easily the easiest and best sex I have had. Fuck my past because my heart was involved, and fuck everything I had agreed to in the last 3 days, and fuck myself because I know me. I _know_ that Axel's going to ask about having sex again and I _know_ that I am going to say yes. Because I told him that I would. I told him that it was okay. And_ fuck_ everything because I _want_ it. I want it more than anything.

I get into the driver's side of my car and sit there for a moment before I slam my hands against the steering wheel and scream. The pain in my chest feels like it is trying to claw its way out of my body, hot tears are stinging my eyes and I let them fall. How did such a stupid, wonderful idea become so painful? I shove my arm against my mouth to muffle my screams and bite down, hard. Till the pain is terrible and I taste copper in my mouth, only then do I calm. Only then, that I have a perfect imprint of my own teeth against my skin do I put the keys in the ignition and start the car. I drive away with dry eyes and a lump in my chest.


	4. Hot White Cum

Have you ever had something so painfully obvious in front of you but you don't notice it until it's too late? That's how I'm feeling at the moment. I'm curled up under my blankets trying my best to ignore the feelings swirling around in my chest. I feel damaged...and like a fool. How had I never noticed that I had fallen in love with my best friend? I have harbored sexual tension toward him for years, and it never once occurred to me that I might be in love with him. It makes total sense now that I think about it. The jealousy of other people dating him, the shock and hurt of the thought of him finding a boyfriend that wasn't me, It was all so_ painfully _obvious. I must just be retarded. Sighing, I reach out and pull my cell off the bedside table and under the covers with me. The damn thing hasn't stopped going off since I got home.

Axel has called me 52 times, left 26 voice mails and sent 38 texts. None of which I have returned. I'm just not up to facing him, over the phone or otherwise. I_ can't._

I flip my phone open and stare at the little number 1 next to my voice mail icon. Sighing again I press the button and listen to the automated voice tell me that I have one new voice mail, there is static for a moment then Axel's voice comes over the speaker.

"Uhhh...hey, Roxy-Socks. I-uh I guess that you don't want to hear from me...seeing as you haven't answered a single message or anything that I have left you in like, four days. I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry if Saturday night made you feel uncomfortable. I...uh...well...Since you've been avoiding me...I kinda talked to Demyx and he kinda, set me up on a date. I-uh I'm going out with his cousin this Friday night. I just kinda wanted to let you know, I didn't use you. I care about you Rox. You are my best friend and...well shit, the sex was fucking amazing and I just-uh wanted to tell you thanks...I guess. You taught me a lot and, well I appreciate you not like, spitting in my face or something when I asked you to have sex with me. Soooo...yeah...Thanks Roxy-Socks. See you around, 'kay? You can't ignore me forever...I hope. Bye."

There is the sound of him hanging up and my throat is tight, my eyes are burning and I feel like someone has gutted me. Because I have been ignoring him for four days, he now has a date for this Friday night. I push my phone off my bed and hear it clatter on the floor. I don't care. I wrap myself tighter under my blanket and I let the hot angry tears flow. Stupid, I'm so stupid. I hate myself. I pull my arm to my mouth and brush my lips over the gnawed skin. I have been chewing on my arm since I got home, and it isn't pretty. There are multiple sets of imprints of my teeth and it's the only way that I have been able to cope with the darkness that is inside my head.

"Roxas?" I hear the door to my room being pushed open and I grumble under my sheets.

"Go away, Sora." I mumble.

I hear the floor boards creak and then the end of the bed dips. "Your mom called my mom and asked if I could come over and talk to you, 'cause you aren't talking to any of them. What's wrong?"

I make an annoyed sound and flip the covers back. "Nothing's wrong. I'm _fine_," I hiss swinging my legs over the side of the bed and stalking to my dresser, pulling out clean clothes.

"You aren't acting fine," Comes Sora's rebuttal, "Does it have something to do with Axel?"

I start and spin to face him, "Why would you say that?"

He gives me a small smile and shakes his head. "Roxas, every problem you have ever had is somehow related to Axel. Everyone knows that you're in love with him. I think the only person that hasn't figured it out is Axel."

I just stand there in my boxers and stare at my cousin, he giggles. I turn back away from him at the sound and yank on my pants. "We had sex." I mutter.

He goes quiet behind me for a moment, "When?"

"Saturday night," I say yanking on my shirt.

"Why?"

"Because he asked," I mutter.

"Soooo...you've been ignoring him for four days because?"

I turn to look at him and I want to punch him, hurt him because in some twisted way everything that has happened is his fault and this is the first time I have ever wanted to blame him. "He told me last week that he might be interested in guys and asked me to have sex with him." I cross my arms over my chest. "So we did. We had mind blowing sex, and now...now he has a date with someone else because I freaked out because I'm retarded and didn't realize that I was fucking in _love_ with him until the morning after."

I spin back around and kick my dresser, the stuff on top of it clatters and a small bottle of lotion falls to the floor and rolls away. "It was only about the sex, I knew it was a bad idea, but I did it anyway because I had been dreaming about it since we hit puberty. Only, apparently, I'm the kind of idiot who doesn't even realize when they are in love with someone."

I hear Sora come up behind me and his arms wrap around me. "Oh Roxas, I'm sorry. I had no idea. Why didn't you say something on Friday? You've always been so attached to him, just like me and-" He cuts of abruptly.

I shake out of his grip and move over to my closet, pulling out a black hoodie with 'Saliva' across the front. I don't want to hear what he has to say, because I know he's talking about Riku. I know they patched things up after we broke up and they are still friends, but I don't want to hear his name. It still hurts.

I side glance over at my cousin and he's giving me this sad look, "He wants to see you. He told me he wants to apologize for how things ended between you two."

I snort and stomp to my door, throwing it open leaving him to either stay in my room alone or follow me. I can hear him on the stairs behind me as I tromp down them into the living room then through to the kitchen. "Roxas!" He calls. "He's really sorry for how he treated you."

I whirl around and glare at him, "He's _sorry_? He's the reason I'm so fucked up and he's _sorry_? No, Sora. Just no. You can forgive him all you want, be his friend, his boyfriend, his butt buddy, whatever the hell you two are. I cannot and will not forgive him."

Sora gives me pleading eyes. "Please, Roxas. He's on his way over, just listen to what he has to say for five minutes. _Please_!"

My resolve crumbles around the edges at the sight of those big blue puppy dog eyes. I pout and cross my arms over my chest, rubbing my forehead with my fist. "Dammit...Alright, fine. I'll give him five God damn minutes, but that's it."

He brightens and hugs me, then skips out of the kitchen going out onto the porch, flipping out his cell. I grab a bag of chips from the cabinet and fall into a kitchen chair, opening the bag roughly. I chomp viciously on the chips as I hear a car pull into the driveway. I watch Sora bound down the side steps and scowl down at the table. If sleeping with Axel had been a terrible idea this was going to be a disaster. I hear two sets of footsteps on the stairs and I cringe, a million different memories flashing threw my mind. I keep my eyes down and shove more chips into my mouth as I hear the screen door open and the two other boys step into my house. My heart is beating a mile a minute and I feel like I'm about to faint, or throw up.

"Roxas."

I flinch. His voice makes my heart skip a beat and I look up from the table slowly. "Hey," I whisper. Riku looks almost exactly the same as I remember him, except it looks like he's put on a lot of muscle.

"Can we talk?" He asks softly.

I nod my heart in my throat and get up from the table. I walk back through the living room and guide Riku up the stairs to my room. When he steps inside I shut the door behind him, then go and sit on my bed. He looks around the room for a moment before those sea green eyes settle on me. "I like what you've done with your room."

I roll my eyes, "What do you want Riku?"

He shifts from one foot to the other, "I just wanted to say sorry...for how I treated you. I...I know it's my fault you were all messed up... I heard some things and I just wanted to let you know that I'm sorry...and you weren't only a replacement. I liked you."

"You sure have a fucked up way of showing it," I hiss glaring at him.

He looks guilty and bites his lip, "I was pretty messed up too, Roxas." He whispers softly, sadly. "The person I was in love with didn't...doesn't love me back. Sora doesn't feel that way for me. He wants to be friends, just friends. And it's killing me." His eyes flash from between silver strands and I realize that he's crying. Not much, just the barest of glistening on his cheek.

"And I started to miss you." He takes in an aggravated breath. "I fucking miss you because I never had to worry about hiding with you. You were open and honest, and great in bed...and I fucking _miss you_, Roxas."

I gape at him. I have actually never talked with Sora about what was going on with him and Riku. After everything went down we ignored it and remained close, never talked about it. I sigh and rub my forehead. I expected a lot of things from Riku, crying was not one of them.

"Come here," I saw softly and pat the space next to me.

He sniffles and moves forward, sitting next to me and putting his head on my shoulder. I wrap my arm around his back and feel the new muscles that he's acquired, it makes me shiver. He pulls back at my shiver and looks at me. I give him an awkward smile, still rubbing his back. Riku has always had an amazing physique and I can't help but want to see how good he looks with the added muscles packed on. I then mentally kick myself. He's in pain, and in need of comfort. He's still looking at me so I open my mouth to say something and his lips are on mine. My mind blanks, body going pliant. Riku nudges his tongue into my mouth and I moan at the feeling. Grasping at his shoulders as he catches my own tongue with his and sucks on it. I let him push me down because my body remembers him, wants him, and my mind has yet to catch up.

"Roxas," He moans when he pulls back trailing hot kisses down the side of my neck. "Have you been a good boy?"

I whimper at the question, knowing where this was going. This was part of the reason that Riku had fucked me up so badly. He liked mind games. It had taken me a long time to work on undoing what Riku had programed into me. I shake my head and push him away from where he was set on leaving marks on my skin. He looks up at me and confusion flashing through those aqua eyes.

"No," I pant. "No mind games. I don't want any of your bullshit, Riku."

He stills for a moment before nodding, not saying anything else as he presses me back into the mattress and I close my eyes and he trails hot kisses down my neck as his hands drift under my shirt. He pulls the garment over my head and tosses it to the floor.

"Wait," I whisper as he captures a nipple between his teeth. "What about Sora?"

Riku flicks his tongue over the nub causing me to shiver, "He went home. Said he didn't want to be around if we decided to beat the shit out of each other."

I roll my eyes, that sounds like Sora.

"So," Riku whispers against my skin. "I heard you slept with Axel."

I start and look down at him where he is swirling his tongue around my belly button. "Who'd you hear that from?"

"Demyx," He murmurs slipping his tongue into the dip.

I moan for him.

"Do you want it?" He asked his lips teasing at the waistband of my jeans.

"Yes..." I gasp my hand coming up to cradle the back of his head. I don't to talk about Axel. I don't want to think about him and the mess that is in my head right now. I just want sex.

He smiles up at me, then he's unbuttoning my pants and tugging them and my boxers down my legs and tossing them to the floor. He gets up then and strips himself. The definition in his arms and stomach make me shudder and my cock twitches. He's smiling down at me as then slips back onto the bed hovering over me.

He without a word he goes into my bedside table taking out the lube and a condom. He set them next to us and leans down to take my dick into his mouth. I moan and arch as he swirls his tongue around the length before pulling back to suckle at the head. My thighs twitch as he bobs his head, inching the length into the back of his throat. I tangle my fingers in those silky strands and for a second I see red, but they're silver. my mind conjurers up the image of Axel blowing me and I arch, thrusting into Riku's mouth. He takes it in stride and pulls off wrapping his fingers around the spit slick organ and pumping me a couple times.

He then removes his fingers before popping the cap off the lube and rubbing it onto two fingers. He scooches back a bit before raising my legs with his clean hand and opening me. I lay there silently as he runs his fingers over my crack before pressing in further seeking out my entrance. His index finger presses against the ring of muscle and I sigh as the digit presses in without resistance. I was still pretty loose from of all the sex with Axel. He pumps his finger into me a few times before adding the second one. I moan and press the side of my face into the mattress as he scissors his fingers, opening me up more. He then twists them around and strokes them over my prostate. I come up off the bed and call his name. he's grinning at me as he removes his fingers, reaching for the condom and tearing it open with his teeth. I watch him roll the green latex over his cock before squeezing a dollop onto the head before working it over the entire length.

I roll over, getting up onto my knees and pressing my face into the bed. I know this is one of Riku's favorite positions, he has told me on multiple occasions that I look 'unbelievably hot' like this. I hear him groan above me and smirk, guess he still feels that way. I feel the tip of him press against my hole and I hold my breath as I press back against him. There is a second where he feels too big and that it won't go in then the head sinks into my body and he slides easily. His breath catches and I let out a long drawn out moan. He pulls back slightly then snaps his hips, shoving back into me. I cry out for him and he takes hold of my hips and starts to pump into me. Our voices mingling as we take in labored breaths and let out moans and groans. If there is one thing that is always going to be good between me and Riku, it's the sex.

He does this little roll of his hips and brushes my prostate and I scream out his name. He does it again and again and _again _and I can't remember my own name anymore. My throat is raw and hot white flashes cloud my vision. I feel Riku's thrusts become more erratic, deeper and I can tell that he's already close. Hasn't he been with anyone since we broke up? I take hold of my weeping erection and begin to stoke it, my hips moving into my hand then back into Riku's thrusts. I hear him make a choked cry and he stills. I work myself feverishly, and with Riku pressing me into the mattress and with a harsh twist at the apex of one stroke I'm spilling into my hand. I collapse onto the bed and pant as Riku pulls himself out of me and leaves the room. I lay there for only a moment before I get up and go to my desk and retrieve a couple of tissues and clean my hand.

I toss the used tissues into the little bin next to my computer and pad over to the side of the bed and pick up my clothes. I'm just pulling on my shirt, my pants hanging low on my hips when Riku reappears. He picks his own pants up off the floor and pulls them on. We don't say anything and I plop down on the bed and pick up the condom wrapper and lube, putting the lube back where it goes and standing once again, walking silently over to the trash and throwing out the foil wrapper. When I turn around Riku is standing there awkwardly. I can't help it, I laugh at him.

"What?" He asks irritated.

"I'm sorry," I gasp. "You just look like you are waiting for me to demand something, or hit you."

He looks off to the side, "Well I kinda am."

My laughter fades, "This was a one-time thing Riku. I don't ever want to see you again, okay? I forgive you for being a major prick, but I do not want you in my life."

He looks at me almost gratefully. "Alright, Roxas. Thanks, seriously. I needed this. All of it." He then turns and walks out of my life for the second time. Hopefully though, this is the last time.

I sigh. Well, that's one problem solved, I think. Now if only I could figure out what to do about Axel.

~O~


End file.
